Batman and the Fairy Princess
by Iggy's iPod
Summary: It's Halloween, and Nudge has convinced the flock to go trick-or-treating. What will Max do when she finds out what her costume is going to be? And what will Fang do when faced with the dreaded job of buying makeup? Plus a BONUS CHAPTER! Please R&R!
1. The Costume

**AN:**_ We don't own Maximum Ride considering how we're not JamesP, considering how JamesP probably wouldn't have a fanfiction account anyway. _

_We would like to give credit to our awesome friend Devian's Denial, who helped write this. Thanks so much!_

_Hope you enjoy our twoshot!_

1

_The Costume  
_

_Max POV_

"Max, you should be Buffy the Vampire Slayer!"

"No."

We were deciding on Halloween costumes. Not my favorite. Not my idea. But _somebody_ decided that we needed to dress up since we had missed this fantastic holiday since most of our childhood life was spent living in dog crates. Though some may say that we spent our childhood _in_ a Halloween world, with the freaks and the scariness and all that jazz.

"Fine then," Nudge said. "Max, you make a suggestion."

"Uh…how about an invisible person? Then you could just _pretend_ that I was trick-or-treating with you."

"But then you'd miss all the fun!" Angel looked devastatingly disappointed.

"I'm sure I'll survive." I rolled my eyes and looked at Fang for support. They wanted to make him Batman. Which was fine for him, considering all they had to add was bat ears and he'd be all set. He returned my glance, but his look said something more like "Just let them have their fun," rather than what I'd been hoping for. _Thanks a lot, Fang._

Gazzy had recommended being Robin.

Nudge… I didn't know what she was doing and she wouldn't tell us.

Angel the little demon was going to be an angel.

Iggy was going to be a mime. He wasn't to enthusiastic about Halloween either. Great. I'll go stand over there by him.

"Max should be a princess 'cuz she's so pretty," Angel said dreamily. "What do you think, Fang?"

"Uh…"

I looked at him, smirking. "Yes, what do you think, Fang?"

"Sounds…great…" He mumbled. He suddenly had things to do and he fled for the kitchen.

"I know!" Nudge jumped up, waving a note pad of paper in her hand and brandishing a pencil in the other. "We'll draw from a hat!!"

"Fine," I said. I could just put in a whole bunch of InvisaGirl slips, and tip the odds in my favor. Underhanded and sneaky, but, hey, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.

"I think we should all write things _except_ Max."

Crap. Creepy little angel demon read my mind. Angel smiled at me angelically. I put on my stone face.

Ten minutes later I was undergoing extreme torture at the hand of my flock. Yes people. Torture.

"I'm gonna put in The Bearded Lady," Iggy declared quietly. "Shame I wouldn't get to see it."

Any sense of unity I had shared with Iggy a minute ago had evaporated.

"Max hates you now, Ig," said Angel as she put her slip of paper into a baseball hat. Gazzy snickered as he dropped his in. Fang was still in the kitchen and hadn't bothered to come out.

"Fang?" Nudge called. "Don't'cha want to contribute?"

"No." Fang poked his head out from the kitchen door. "_I _don't want to incur the wrath of Maximum."

"Okay, then. We'll just put in what you'd have written anyway." She whipped out a permanent marker. "'Supermodel' is one word, right?"

Two gags.

One from me.

The other was from Fang, who dove at Nudge and proceeded to rip that poor piece of paper to shreds.

"Okay." Nudge stated in an all business tone, when the tussle was over. Fang had won. No duh. "And now! We draw!"

"Well, Max draws," Angel amended.

I groaned and plunged my hand into the offered hat, pulling out a slip and holding it like it was a slimy snake I didn't really want to touch. At ALL.

I could feel the girls holding their breath. Gazzy and Iggy were laughing silently.

I cracked my eyes open and read the condemning words.

_Pamela Andersen._

I died.

"GAZZY!!" I hollered. He looked up at me sheepishly. I glared at him. "You're in for it, buster."

"Pick another, Max." Nudge handed me the bowl, glaring at the Gasman. "But you _have_ to do this one, 'k?"

Praying that the next one was not another _Pamela Andersen_-type, I shoved my hand into the hat and came out with…

_Princess._

"A Fairy Princess," Angel clarified. Seeing it in my thoughts.

Let's say…I died, again.


	2. The Craft Store of Total Humiliation

2

_The Craft Store of Total Humiliation_

_Max POV_

"Fang, please take the boys to the craft store, we need makeup." Nudge instructed.

I sat on the floor, in a pile of frilly fabrics and ribbons as Nudge sewed something together, and Angel helped. This was insane. Here I was, the great Maximum Ride, the subject of ultimate torture. Dress up. The things I do for my family. Seriously.

Fang looked confused. "Er, why do we need to get makeup?"

Nudge gave Fang a look that plainly said that she doubted his intelligence. "Because," she said obviously, "Max needs it. You know, her costume?"

"No, I meant, why do _we_, as in Gazzy, Iggy, and I have to get it?"

Nudge sighed, then grinned evilly. "Unless of course you want to stay here and help fit the bodice onto Max-"

It's amazing how quickly the boys could move when they wanted to. They were out the door before you could say _awkward._

"Nice job..." I said weakly, as I prepared myself for utter embarrassment.

_Fang POV_

"_We are so lame." _Iggy mumbled as we walked inconspicuously down a street.

"Better than being back there, though." Gazzy said cheerily. My mood, was quite the opposite.

I hate Halloween.

"Is that the craft store...up ahead?" Iggy asked. I glanced down the street. A neon green sign said, _Abby's Crafts and More._

Below were the words, _Halloween sale: Makeup 40 off._

I nodded, but almost forgot one small thing. "I'm nodding, Ig," I said. "How did you know, anyway?"

"I thought I could smell total _doom_ coming from that place." Iggy answered darkly.

The little bells on the door chimed as we walked in. The mixed smell of plastic and perfume hit me in a wave of instant dislike. We followed the little green signs that said what each isle was. When we came to the makeup isle, I sighed in relief to see it was empty. I had been having anxiety about the isle being full of girls which would have made this incredibly awkward situation even more awkward.

The three of us stood in front of the many multicolored boxes, pencil things and brushes, before releasing that none of us had a clue about what we were supposed to find.

I stared blankly at it all. "Does anyone know what it looks like?" I murmured.

"Considering how I can't _see_ anything, I'll have to say no."

"Do I look like I've ever worn makeup before?"

"This is great, then," I said sarcastically. The situation was getting worse and it didn't help the the song playing over the intercom speakers was Tom Jones's _'What's New Pussycat'_.

It's insane that I was able to fight off crazy hairy Erasers practically in my sleep, yet I wasn't able to go into a store and buy makeup, let alone know what it looked like in the first place.

"Hang on, Nudge gave me a list." Iggy put his hand in his pocket an drew out a crumpled piece of paper.

"Great, Ig, hand it over." I took the paper and read it quietly. "Moss green eyeliner, forest green eye shadow, peach blush, Maybelline no-clump mascara-"

"English, please?" Gazzy asked.

"Can I help you?" My stomach dropped and I turned on the spot. I short young woman stood before us with a pleasant expression that you'd expect form a clerk. She had red hair and...a...shirt. On it was a name tag that said: _Abby's Crafts and More, My name is Abby._

Right.

"Er...yes..." I handed her the piece of paper.

"We have no idea what we're doing," Gazzy put in.

Abby read the paper and she frowned slightly giving me a look that meant way too much...yet I couldn't figure out what it was.

"Wouldn't you prefer these?" She asked, and she gestured to the stuff lower down, where all the dark colors were...mostly what looked like eyeliner.

"No." I said. She gave me a peculiar expression, and that's when I realized that her questions were directed at _me._

I caught on, and scowled.

"Did you assume it was for me?" I said slowly.

Abby realized her mistake and she blurted, "Oh, no, of course not!" She forced a smile. "Um...little sister?"

I glared at her. Abby backed up. "Okeey..." she said quickly. "The stuff you need it here." She pointed, then looking utterly befuddled, walked away. I heard her mumble something the sounded a whole lot like "He _looked_ like it..."

"Wow." Iggy remarked grinning. "She...thought...it...was...for...you..."

"Shuddup." I hit him on the back of the head. "Lets just get this stuff and go. _Now._"

Abby was at the counter when we walked up. She cashed us in without a word but kept staring at me. It was kind of annoying.

We got back to the girls a quickly as we could. When we walked in, Max was standing in the middle of the room looking like she wanted to throttle something, in a very frilly green and pink dress. When she saw us she gave a very un-Max-like shriek and ran for the bathroom.

Nudge came up to us and I thrust the plastic bag at her. She took it and looked inside. "Thanks guys!" she said.

I walked off to the kitchen, but before I could get out of sight of Nudge, she called to me, "Just one more thing, Fang. I forgot to write on the list...Max needs some lipstick, and if you don't mind, could you pick up some green tights at the department store?"

I dropped down into a kitchen chair, and put my head in my hands. _Not again, _I thought.


	3. Setting Out For Some More Doom

**Chapter 3: Setting out for Some More Doom**

We love doom. So what the heck?

Max POV:

"I don't care how you dress me as long as I'm not naked," said a very bored-looking Iggy, who's face was painted completely white, making him very corpse-ish. There were black tears trailing down his cheeks. Nudge had done a good job, it seemed.

Angel looked shocked, and adorable in her little white angel dress. "Mimes are never naked!" She said defiantly.

"No one is going to be naked," clarified Nudge, who about twenty minutes ago had disappeared into the bathroom and reappeared as SUPRISE! I didn't actually know what it was, and Nudge couldn't put it into one word so it was summed up to be "girl-who-has-all-the-make-up-and-clothes-and-friends-she-could-ever-want-girl" or something like that. She was wearing a massive blond, curly wig that just looked hilarious, so it didn't really matter what she was. After her success with Iggy's face, Nudge had insisted on painting everyone else's, no matter how many whines, protests, or locked doors got in her way. At the moment she was painting a mask on to Gazzy's face.

I was sitting at the kitchen table with Fang. Every opportunity I got, I glared at him. Why? Because for the past twenty minutes, he had not managed to keep a straight face, that's why. Apparently this whole princess thing was just too much for him.

"Your tiara is lopsided, Max." He said quietly, grinning.

"Go to hell, Fang."

"That's not very nice of you."

"Yeah? You try sitting in ten yards of frill."

As most everyone could tell I was in a very bad mood. Frankly, Fang didn't really deserve my abrasive behavior towards him. But from the way his eyes were laughing at me, it didn't bother him. God, I want to strangle something. If it wasn't for Angel I'd have ripped this stupid princess dress off the second Nudge had fitted it on.

Angel, Angel Angel. She wanted to go trick-or-treating on Halloween so badly. Even though I could come up with numerous reasons why we shouldn't, I decided to let the kids have their fun. They didn't get too much of it anyway. But this generous decision was before I found out how torturous wearing a dress was. I couldn't run without tripping, and these gauzy fairy wings made it impossible to get my own wings out. So if while roaming the streets with the other trick-or-treaters, we got attacked by Erasers, or robots, or whatever, sorry guys! Max gets to be monster meat because she's too much of a mush-ball to say no to her flock about going freaking trick-or-treating!

Ugh.

"Fa-ang," Angel sang as she came into the kitchen, "I have your bat ears." She held them out to him. "Put them on."

"Yeah Fang," I said, smirking." Put on the fuzzy bat ears."

Fang stuck his tongue out at me, and slid the bat ears onto his head.

---------

"Everyone got their pillow cases? Costumes still on? Max, your tiara is lopsided."

I glared at Nudge as she fixed my tiara. I heard the boys snicker---except Iggy who was silently fuming that he couldn't see me in my frilly fairy costume. I decided that I was going to kill Fang later. He still couldn't keep a straight face whenever he looked at me. It didn't help that his costume was just fine! He was still in his usual black except he had a batman logo on his shirt, bat ears sticking out of his head and a little mask. And a cape. It wasn't embarrassing at all. I was pissed.

"Don't be mad, Max," Angel gave me one of her looks that melt. "You'll have fun tonight!"

I highly doubted it, but I didn't let it show. Tonight was for the kids. I just had to live through it.

We went out into the night and walked maybe half a mile before we reached the suburb of houses. There were tons of kids out and about in costumes, knocking on people's doors and begging for candy.

"I'm so excited!" Nudge said as we went up to the first house. "Trick or treat!" The kids chorused. Fang and I didn't say anything. It felt too weird. A lady came out dressed as a witch and gave us candy. Just like that. An adult just willingly gave young children sugar. Wow. Brave, brave people....

We continued down the street. Angel ran up to me and held my hand. "I know your mad at him," she whispered to me.

"Uh-huh." I looked over a Fang who was eating the snicker's bar he had just received.

Angel smiled slyly and ran up to the rest of the group.

Oh god. A sly smile from Angel is never a good thing.

----------

After about a half an hour of going door to door getting candy we took a break on a street corner. Or bags had been getting rather heavy, but I noticed one thing---Fang's hadn't. I went over to him. He was eating another snickers bar.

"Fang?"

"Yeah?"

"Have you been eating _all_ your candy?"

"Uh-huh."

"Why the---" Then I looked over at Angel who was sitting right next to Fang. She was smiling. Then she winked. Then I figured out what Angel was doing. Great.

"_Eat the snickers bar, Fang," _Angel whispered to him, "_Eat it."_

I had a strange desire to cry and laugh hysterically at the same time. As we continued down the rows of houses, Fang started to hum. And then he was shouting "Trick or treat!" along with everybody else. I hadn't eaten a single piece of my candy and I wasn't planning on it. I wasn't very thrilled about being out in the open, in the dark, surrounded by strangers, in a dress and not being able to open my wings. Not to mention with a sugar-highed Fang who probably wouldn't be able to tell an Eraser form a person in a werewolf costume. I wasn't sure if I was annoyed or happy that Angel decided to get back at Fang for me. I just wanted to get the flock safely back home as soon as possible!

I suddenly felt a cold prickle on my neck and I looked around.

Oh....crap. It appears that I lost the flock.

Or...they decided to ditch me.

Anyway, I was alone--apart from the other innocent-looking children. My flock was nowhere to be seen. This was just great!

Okay, Maximum. Try not to panic too much. They probably just went on ahead and haven't noticed that I'm not there. If I just walk down the street I'll find them...

Even though I tried to calm my anxiety with these thoughts, I couldn't help but think that the flock must have been captured or something. That they had been attacked and needed my help---or I was the one under attack, and I was trapped in this parallel dimension where my flock couldn't hear or see me, and that this was some sort of torture to drive me mad.

I heard a scuffling near my feet, and then there was a small yip.

"Aiee!" I jumped back, startled by the abrupt closeness of this thing...this....creature....this...this...puppy? Huh?

The puppy hopped forward yipped again. It looked like a little golden retriever-mutt-type of dog, with huge eyes and big clumsy feet.

Well this was weird....

The puppy hopped forward again.

"Oh no you don't," I told it, stepping back. God, I hope Angel never sees this puppy. She's want to keep it for sure.

I walked as swiftly as I could in my dress down the street. I had only gone a few yards when I realized the puppy was following me. It looked so cute and innocent...As if! It probably wasn't a real puppy at all! Maybe it was actually a robot sent to spy on me! And the puppy could probably shoot lasers from it's eyes if I dare look to close, or stay in it's shooting range!

Now I 'm thoroughly creeped out.

I continued down the street, trying not to have a mental breakdown while swearing and promising myself that I would never let the flock go trick-or-treating again. When I reached the end, where there was a fork to more houses, I was ready to strangle something. The puppy was still following me. My flock had abandoned me and didn't seemed to notice that I was gone. I was just waiting for the next bad thing to happen. Like Erasers dressed up as werewolves. Just when this happy little thought came to me, I heard, among the choruses of "trick or treat!" coming from the houses, there was a rustle in the trees.

I spun around in time to see a big muscly man coming out onto the road, his arms stretched out in front of him. He was dragging a foot and moaning. His face was painted with fake blood and scars. It took me a minute to realize.

"ARI!?!" I yelled, so surprised I almost fell over, where I would have squashed the puppy who was whimpering and hiding behind my legs from this giant person.

"I'M ARI THE ZOMBEH!" Ari said in his best interpretation of the undead. He dropped his arms and grinned at me. "Hi fairy!"

I backed up from my half-brother, ready to run (because I couldn't fly) at the first sign of attack.

"Hi puppy!" Ari said happily.

I looked up at Ari. He seemed to have the same goofy expression Fang had had after eating half of his candy bag. Was Ari really just out trick-or-treating too?

"What are you doing here, Ari?" I asked him.

"ARI THE ZOMBEH!" He protested, pulling a bag of M&M's and stuffing a handful in his mouth before answering. "It's halloween! Am I not aloud to dress up and eat candy? Am I not allowed to say hi to my big sis?"

"Um, let's think," I began, ready to recite a whole bunch of reasons why I didn't want to see Ari, including how he nearly killed Fang numerous times and how he works for our enemy, but Ari, in his sugared state, lost interest and was squatting on the ground talking to the puppy.

"Hey little fella, you're so fine, I'd buy the world to make you mine. Your so cute and fluffy too, I would get food and toys for you...."

Great. He was rhyming now. Okay time to go.

"Don't leave!" Ari said when I started to back away.

"Sorry, Ari---"

"ARI THE ZOMBEH!"

"---Ari the Zombie, but I gotta go. I heard that house over there is giving out whole chocolate bars, though. " I pointed in a random direction.

"Oh, cool!" And Ari, in his sugar-highed, dopey state, ran off.

Wow. Okay. Time to go find the flock and vent all my frustration and anxiety at Fang!

I walked quickly down the next street and started to freak out some more. The puppy loped on behind me. I turned down another street and started to run.

"Fang! Fang!" I had finally spotted my flock. They were clustered outside of a large house that apparently had a haunted house-event inside. Fang looked around in an excited way. He was eating another snickers bar.

"Hi, Max!"

"Fang! There's a puppy following me!!" I gasped, pointing the the little devil as it trotted over.

"Aw," Fang knelt down and reached out for the puppy. "It's cute."

"NO, Fang. No! It's a BAD PUPPY!"

Fang wasn't paying attention. "You know....I really like the word puppy...."

"UUUHHG!" I let out a satisfying sound of frustration. "Does no one care about me anymore!?"

Angel turned around and looked up at me. "Oh, Max, we didn't forget about you! There was just this really amazing haunted house that we just _had_ to go to, but you wandered off and the group was going, so we had to go!" She gave me a sincere look and my heart melted.

"Okay. I forgive you. But not you!" I yelled at Fang who was running around in circles singing the Batman theme song. After a few seconds watching him I had to turn away. It was that painful to watch.

"Just tell me," I asked Angel. "Exactly how much candy did you...make Fang to eat?"

Angel grinned. "All of it," she said sweetly.

After a minute I grinned too. "Nudge?"

Nudge turned around her blond wig bouncing. "Yeah?"

"Throw me your camera."

She gave gave me an odd look, but tossed it over to me.

I caught it, turned it on, and pressed the record button. Maybe this night would turn out to be not too horrible after all. I grinned evilly at the spinning Fang. By tomorrow he would definitely regret that he ever mocked the Fairy Princess.


End file.
